Ask John about (the small corner of) the military (that he knows about)!

edited March 2009 in General
Okay,

So like, I realize some of you may have misconceptions about what exactly somebody in the armed forces does from day to day. Still others may not know what the differences between the military, the Army, or the Marines are. Still others may be surprised if they ever see me in public and I'm, like, not wearing a uniform I guess? Because seriously I went to visit a friend in New York once and she was totally weirded out that I wasn't in uniform.

For the most part my job is like anybody else's, except I took an oath to die I guess if need be to preserve freedom. Also I can be sent to jail for not going to work. Also I can be called up at three in the morning to go to a country I have never heard of. Also I get 10% off my bill at IHOP.

Anywho, this is where you can ask me (and Kyle!) all about being in the military. Well, the Air Force atleast. And it's not like we're paratroopers either. So I may know stuff about the door-kickers if you want to know that, but my expertise more lies in what us non-berets do! Nothing's taboo; ask what you want.

NOTE: Nothing in this post is endorsed by the United States Air Force, the Department of Defense, the United States of America, or any of its subsidiaries.

Comments

  • edited March 2009
    What is the armed forces' current policy on homosexuality?
  • edited March 2009
    Depends! If you're ACTIVE DUTY - which means you're employed by the Federal government, then the Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Don't Harass rule still applies. That means you can be homosexually or bisexually oriented, but engaging in homosexual acts or disclosing said homosexuality is grounds for discharge. Also, leadership can not initiate a witch hunt to find out if you are gay if they have no solid evidence to that effect.

    Now, if you are in the NATIONAL GUARD - that is the portion of the military that is employed by individual states, then you can be openly homosexual and still stay in. You think this might be a problem when you deploy to the AOR (Area of Responsibility which includes all active warzones), but then you have to take General Order No. 1 into effect. It says, among other things, that sex, pornography, cohabitation, and alcohol is prohibited. So a Guardsman could get punished for engaging in sexual acts (homo or otherwise) while in a warzone. Unless it's a chick. Because seriously - that's awesome.

    ALSO OF NOTE: Sodomy is against the Uniform Code of Military Justice. You may think, "But you just told us gay man sex is illegal, why do you need to remention it?" Well! Sodomy, in the UCMJ (that's Uniform Code of Military Justice agan), is defined as any sex that's not a penis in a vagina. That means that blowjobs and anal sex is OUT.

    NOTE: Nothing in this post is endorsed by the United States Air Force, the Department of Defense, the United States of America, or any of its subsidiaries.
  • edited March 2009
    DOUBLE POST OF: Actually what I was really hoping to do here was field questions about my day-to-day life. I don't mind talking about these large issues, that's fine, but what I really want to do is dispel some myths and shine light on some truths. Example:

    Show of hands - who here thinks that we march everywhere when we're on base?
  • edited March 2009
    I assumed you marched everywhere, except over bridges.
  • edited March 2009
    See, I'm not big on marching. If I'm walking anywhere, it usually oscillates anywhere between a saunter and a mosey.
  • edited March 2009
    So, in active duty, do you wear a full military uniform, or do you just walk around in normal clothes?

    Also, how long is a typical tour of Iraq?
  • edited March 2009
    What are the sleeping conditions like? Are you haphazardly cramped into a room full of hammocks with 8 other guys? Or are you all in king-sized beds with fluffy pillows?
  • edited March 2009
    NOT DEPLOYED aka AT HOME aka IN GARRISON: I wear my uniform when I go to work. Tuesday through Friday that's my ABU - Airman Battle Uniform, picture here: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:USAF_Airman_Battle_Uniform.jpg

    The Chief of Staff (highest ranking General) of the Air Force recently instituted a policy where it's mandatory to wear our Dress Blues every Monday, pictured here: http://www.citamn.afrc.af.mil/shared/media/photodb/photos/070917-F-0000Z-007.jpg

    Actually, it doesn't look EXACTLY like that. That's the new uniform. The only difference between that and the old one is the pointed pockets and the belt around the jacket. For awhile they were planning on making the new jacket look like this:
    http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_go0QYOkH4xU/Rw5T17GrEeI/AAAAAAAABTs/XEHn4amqe2c/s320/AirForceUniformESB.jpg
    I wouldn't have minded. =D

    On the weekends I don't wear a uniform because I'm not at work! Also I take it off either before I leave work on the weekdays or after I get home. It's not a bad uniform, maybe a little warm for the Florida heat, but I like a TShirt and jeans much better.

    I sleep in my bed in my house. It's a queen bed. The pillows are soft.

    DEPLOYED: It differs from location to location. If you're at a more established base (which I am right now) you get better accomodations. We definitely don't wear our dress blues out here - it's ABUs all the way. I work 12/7, too, so no days off. That's fine though, because there's really not much to do out here anyway. My sleeping accomodations here aren't so bad. We're in trailers. They're about 50' by 10' containers with doors. My room in particular has three beds and I share it with two other guys. So I have to be extra quiet when I get off shift. The beds are twin. I didn't have to worry about linens - the housing office takes care of that. KBR even does my laundry! They lose a sock every once in awhile...

    Now, if I were deployed to, say, a FOB (that's forward operations base) then I might be in less grand arrangements. I might be in a large tent (possibly an Alaskan - http://www.alaskastructures.com/ ) and sleeping on cots. Really it depends on what they can get out to the spot, and how long they plan on being there.
  • edited March 2009
    Should an overweight grad school dropout with no job prospects consider the military?
  • edited March 2009
    Do you spend all of your time in the base? Are there safer parts of town where you guys might go, or is everywhere outside the base just a big no-no?
  • edited March 2009
    Is boot camp as bad as the movies make it out to be?
  • edited March 2009
    Jake: I know that the Air Force sure helped me grow up a bit. Your skin gets thicker and your balls get bigger. Most military (combat) jobs, though, don't translate to civilian sector jobs. There are a few, however, that will give you some marketable skills. I, for example, take care of server administration and a lot of Cisco stuff. I'm a fairly decent computer guy. Thanks Air Force! That's marketable. Plus there's the leadership aspect, followership aspect, and responsibility aspect that gets instilled in most military members. Employers can usually safely assume that if you've made it 4-6 years in the military without getting "Discharged Under Other Than Honorable Conditions" then you're A-OK.

    PLUS: I have a security clearance in my job. That means a third-party security company ran an investigation on me; interviewed my friends and their friends and my family and their friends and checked my finances for the past 10 years and was able to reasonably assume I'm not likely to have any reason to sell secrets or want to fuck over the gov't. When I get out of the military, I will still have this clearance (unless I totally fuck it up!). There are some places that will hire you on a security clearance ALONE. The investigation is EXPENSIVE, so a lot of companies usually look for somebody who already has a clearance instead of hiring somebody and then paying for a clearance, which may or may not even clear depending on the results of the investigation. It's cheaper, you see.

    RYAN: I'm sure you mean when I'm deployed. At home station I live off base and there's really nothing to do on base except work. Here in Balad, there are people who go over the wire, sure, but that's so they can go on patrol. Now this isn't the case everywhere in the world. If you're stationed in the United Arab Emirates or Qatar, for example, it's usually safe and consumer friendly enough outside the base that you can go hang out in a bar downtown. Qatar is VERY westernized, now that I mention it. It's like America 2. I'm sure there is NOWHERE in Afghanistan where you're allowed to go off base unless you're on a mission.
  • edited March 2009
    Do you have to write your name in your underpants to make sure you get them back?
  • edited March 2009
    Informative! I approve of this thread.
  • edited March 2009
    VOLTAGE: Which movies? I can't think of any movies that show Air Force basic training much. The only ones that spring to mind are Army or Marine basic training. I don't know much about Army..but the Marine's basic training is 12 weeks. That's intense! They get beaten up, too. It's part of the whole, "Break down and build up," strategy where they turn you into a war machine. ARGH!

    The Air Force's basic training takes place on beautiful Lackland Air Force Base, Texas. It's currently 8 weeks long, but when I went through (just under three years ago) it was only 6 weeks. The purpose of the training, really, is to weed out people who fall under one or more of the following categories:
    • Physically unfit (which can get people killed in a war zone)
    • Poor attention to detail (which can get people killed in a war zone)
    • Can't deal with stress (which can get people killed in a war zone)
    • Poor team players (which can get people killed in a war zone)

    So a lot of it is going to sleep 2 am and waking up at 5 am. Making sure the bathroom is spotless. Your bed is made EXACTLY to regs. There are no strings on your uniforms. Your T-shirts are folded JUST SO. You seriously get a manual that tells you how your wall locker/bed is supposed to look. Even how to arrange your shoes underneath. Any deviation from this can get you "washed out" which usually means you get kicked out of your current flight and set back a week or two. There's a week of "warrior week" where you get bussed out to a camp site and carry around fake guns. I think that nowadays there are actually two weeks of that. You sleep in cots and guard your tent and run around in mud and heat and sweaty boots and get blisters and some people pass out and low-crawl through ants and under razor wire while the instuctors shoot guns overhead. That's just warrior week, though. There's a lot of what's called "drill" where your TI (short for MTI which is Military Training Instructor - think R. Lee Ermey) marches you around and gives you commands ("Left FACE. About FACE. Foward MARCH. Flight HALT.") That's just another aspect of the "attention to detail," though.

    There's also the "acedemic" portion of it. It's not math or science or history. Well, it's Air Force history. And customs and curtesies. Do you know at what distance I'm supposed to salute the flag? Do you know during which occasions to call the room to attention? - stuff like that.

    So Air Force boot camp isn't as bad as Marine bootcamp - which I guess is what you mean by "what the movies make it out to be". Then again, I'm no expert on Marine boot camp so I can't say for sure. All I know is that I made it. It was rough. I cried once. Once. I never jerked off in the shower though, so you can be sure I have SOME integrity.

    TANYA: We were required to write a LAUNDRY MARK on all of our items during basic training, only. The laundry mark consists of the first initial of our last name and the last four digits of our social security number. Example: F4521. It's a countermeasure against theft. However, since then, I have found it wise to do this anyway. Atleast on the items you take to the shower. I had a really nice fleece and even my TOWEL stolen from me while I was in the shower about a month ago. Now, the towel incident seems like a mistake. I stepped out of the shower and my towel wasn't hanging outside the stall where I put it. There was a towel hanging one stall over, though. It belonged to the guy who assumedly took mine. So I took it, carefully dried myself with it, had it laundered, and then put my laundry mark on it. Now all my towels have the laundry mark. The fleece, on the other hand, was most likely straight up theft. =[
  • edited March 2009
    The only ones that spring to mind are Army or Marine basic training. I don't know much about Army..but the Marine's basic training is 12 weeks. That's intense! They get beaten up, too. It's part of the whole, "Break down and build up," strategy where they turn you into a war machine. ARGH!

    My brother is a marine. I've heard some great stories, and tidbits of information which I believe I may have shared with you guys before! For instance, if a marine get charged with any crimes, he is also charged with possession of a weapon, because he is legally considered a weapon. Also, no more than three marines may ever be together in public, because four or more marines is considered an unstoppable force.
  • edited March 2009
    Too awesome. However, Chuck Norris is equal to 6 billion marines, and everyone is too afraid to arrest him
  • edited March 2009
    Not as informative! I condemn this thread.