Don't drink and drive.

DustinTheWindDustinTheWind
edited November 2009 in General
Society never ceases to warn us of the dangers of drinking while driving. However, there is a large number of greater, more pertinent dangers of drunk actions it should be warning us of instead. For example:

*Don't drink and dance.
*Don't drink and betroth.
*Don't drink and skydive.
*Don't drink and BASE jump.
*Don't drink and wear women's clothing. (unless you are, in fact, a woman)
*Don't drink and ski.
*Don't drink and skee-ball.
*Don't drink and breakdance.
*Don't drink and gravy.
*Don't drink and post in forums.
*Don't drink and moderate forum posts.
*Don't drink and Stickam.
*Don't drink and Twitter.
*Don't drink and Facebook.
*Don't drink and internet.
*Don't drink and time travel.
*Don't drink and warp jump.
*Don't drink and summon the old ones.
*Don't drink and walk into Mordor.
*Don't drink and go in the long grass.
*Don't drink and read about conspiracy theories.
*Don't drink and speculate on conspiracy theories.
*Don't drink and infiltrate the CIA headquarters in hopes of uncovering conclusive evidence about the conspiracy.
*Don't drink and join the French Foreign Legion.
*Don't drink and order Netflix videos.
*Don't drink and watch the Star Wars Holiday Special (though quite honestly, you are unlikely to get through it without a shot or twelve, even with a Riff Track.)

Comments

  • SilverwardSilverward
    edited October 2009
    Don't drink and not post in the Love, Sweet Love thread.
  • Professor MacJakeProfessor MacJake
    edited October 2009
    DustinTheWind wrote: »
    *Don't drink and wear women's clothing.

    Keep your laws OFF MY BODY
  • SerephelSerephel
    edited October 2009
    Wholeheartedly agree Tak. Drinking and not posting in the love thread is just rude.
  • Mish42Mish42
    edited October 2009
    What is this list??? I'll agree to don't drink and drive, but I mean come on. Has anyone NOT danced while drunk before? The don't even ENJOY dancing unless I'm drunk.

    Don't drink and not tell ANYONE how much you love them.
  • shakeycatshakeycat
    edited October 2009
    Am I exempt from the women's clothing one? I do hate to have to change every time I want a beer.
  • kukopankikukopanki
    edited October 2009
    DustinTheWind wrote: »
    *Don't drink and speculate on conspiracy theories.

    I've suffered the consequences of people not obeying this one. It's awful.
  • SerephelSerephel
    edited October 2009
    It's not my fault you refuse to open your eyes and accept the fact that mario is really a government spy covertly kidnapping people from the internet for top secret cybernetic research. What do YOU think really happened to Khan?

    Edit: And mittens.
  • X'o'LoreX'o'Lore
    edited October 2009
    I think I'd allow some exemptions on the women's clothing one.
  • SilverwardSilverward
    edited October 2009
    Serephel wrote: »
    It's not my fault you refuse to open your eyes and accept the fact that mario is really a government spy covertly kidnapping people from the internet for top secret cybernetic research. What do YOU think really happened to Khan?

    Edit: And mittens.

    Did you ever see Khan and Mittens in the same room?
  • mariomario
    edited October 2009
    I can neither confirm nor deny these baseless accusations!
    *Don't drink and post in forums.
    Don't drink and not post in the Love, Sweet Love thread.

    I'm sensing a conflict here.
  • DustinTheWindDustinTheWind
    edited October 2009
    shakeycat wrote: »
    Am I exempt from the women's clothing one? I do hate to have to change every time I want a beer.
    XoLore wrote: »
    I think I'd allow some exemptions on the women's clothing one.

    Okay, yeah. I added an exception to the original post.
  • kukopankikukopanki
    edited October 2009
    Well, that takes the fun out of it.
  • DustinTheWindDustinTheWind
    edited October 2009
    kukopanki wrote: »
    Well, that takes the fun out of it.

    Well apparently I'm going to get complaints either way, so I may as well go with the more correct version.
  • X'o'LoreX'o'Lore
    edited October 2009
    kukopanki wrote: »
    Well, that takes the fun out of it.

    You need to have a rule saying not to do this to make it more fun when you do it anyway. It's always more exciting doing something when you're not supposed to.
  • Shovel Fulla WaffleShovel Fulla Waffle
    edited November 2009
    Don't drink and watch the History Channel.
  • SerephelSerephel
    edited November 2009
    That's ridiculous. The History Channel has the TV show The Universe, and it's widely accepted that you should take a shot whenever physicist Michio Kaku shows up to say something badass.
  • kukopankikukopanki
    edited November 2009
    But Kaku is on THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME.
  • Shovel Fulla WaffleShovel Fulla Waffle
    edited November 2009
    Serephel wrote: »
    That's ridiculous. The History Channel has the TV show The Universe, and it's widely accepted that you should take a shot whenever physicist Michio Kaku shows up to say something badass.

    I got the first season of The Universe for 50% off at Barnes & Noble yesterday. I nearly jizzed my pants.
  • godgod
    edited November 2009
    I think they should sell pocket sized Michio Kakus that people can pull out to answer questions and settle physics disputes. I need one of those so badly.
  • X'o'LoreX'o'Lore
    edited November 2009
    I think I'd have to make a point of having physics disputes in the first place if only to make use of such a thing.

    I am not familiar with this Universe show, however. I suspect I may have deprived myself.
  • SerephelSerephel
    edited November 2009
    I would love a pocket sized Michio Kaku. Could put him on a keychain.

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