Corrupt a Wish

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Comments

  • godgod
    edited July 2008
    X'o'lore changes his avatar. To goatse.

    I wish I could speak Japanese.
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    You speak Japanese. In 1940s America.

    I wish I had a Mac Pro with two thirty inch cinema displays, dual quad core processors running at 3.2 Ghz with 32Gb of RAM and 4TB hard drive space spread out over 4 SATA drives and an NVIDIA Quadro FX 5600.
  • deku12345deku12345
    edited July 2008
    Night Lord wrote: »
    I wish I had a Mac Pro with two thirty inch cinema displays, dual quad core processors running at 3.2 Ghz with 32Gb of RAM and 4TB hard drive space spread out over 4 SATA drives and an NVIDIA Quadro FX 5600.

    You are walking down the street and are suddenly struck in the head by a a Mac Pro with two thirty inch cinema displays, dual quad core processors running at 3.2 Ghz with 32Gb of RAM and 4TB hard drive space spread out over 4 SATA drives and an NVIDIA Quadro FX 5600. The blow kills you instantly.

    I wish for more wishes.
  • NoLongerNoLonger
    edited July 2008
    Sadly that was your last wish, you have more wishes, but the being that grants them has left for all eternity.

    I wish for a the Orange Box to come into my possession.
  • illithid235illithid235
    edited July 2008
    Since you uttered two articles instead of one, the wish follows as if you wished for "a orange box". An airplane comes crashing down into your residence, utterly destroying it. Luckily, your family was away during the crash, but you now have nowhere to live. While you reside in seedy motels, waiting for a new place to live, the airline tries to console you by gifting the airplane's "black box" to you, which is actually colored orange.

    I wish that the library in Alexandria, Egypt, hadn't burned down all those years ago, and that we would still have access to all those now-lost documents.
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    I don't want to corrupt that wish. I also wish it hadn't burnt.

    I wish for a glass of Cranberry juice
  • ZlamzamboZlamzambo
    edited July 2008
    The library in Alexandria, Egypt, is now here, with all that lost information, Yaaa!!! But, all the pages are stained with Cranberry juice, and all the document are now illegible.

    I wish that I had a pet robot
  • mariomario
    edited July 2008
    You receive your pet robot... velociraptor. With free will. And an endless hunger for human flesh.

    I wish my car could drive forever without refueling.
  • X'o'LoreX'o'Lore
    edited July 2008
    Your car prompty pulls out and drives away as if by its own will. It does not require refueling and will not stop for anything. You have no choice but to damage it to force it to stop. It is too complex to repair and no longer functions at all.

    I wish for a swift kick in the rear.

    (So where are you gonna go with this one?)
  • godgod
    edited July 2008
    The foot misses, instead knocking over and breaking a priceless Fabergé Egg you had been looking at in a museum. You are blamed for this.
  • illithid235illithid235
    edited July 2008
    Nope, that goes against the rules, sir. You have to grant his wish. Like so.

    Kick is the name of a male prostitute in Bangkok. He moves really fast.

    EDIT: Aaaand I forgot to make a wish.

    I wish that God could make an object that it couldn't move.
  • mariomario
    edited July 2008
    God does so. The object is a knife embedded in your stomach. God is the only doctor on call, and is thus unable to extricate the blade in time.

    I wish for Schrödinger's Cat.
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    The cat dies. Maybe.

    I wish that I never have to give you up, never have to let you down, never have to let you down and desert you.
  • mariomario
    edited July 2008
    This happens, but you are quickly trampled to death by an angry Anonymous mob for misquoting the song.

    I wish that an object were brought into existence which was completely incapable of interacting with our Universe.
  • illithid235illithid235
    edited July 2008
    Ooooohh, good one, Mario.

    A parallel universe is created, completely separate from our universe in every and any way, save miraculous wishing. A rock is also created in this universe, but nothing else. It is entirely devoid of anything else, save this rock. You are transferred to this new universe to keep this rock company.

    I wish that I didn't have a wish to use.
  • mariomario
    edited July 2008
    Gah! I hadn't anticipated that. Kudos!

    This game is harder than I thought. I will beat you, 1-800-CORRUPT-A-WISH!
  • X'o'LoreX'o'Lore
    edited July 2008
    Your wish is passed on to another person. This person hates you and wishes you were dead. You die. They feel horrible for the rest of their life because they weren't serious.

    I wish pennies were called coppers.
  • QueenQuinlinQueenQuinlin
    edited July 2008
    Pennies are now called coppers. They arrest you.

    I wish that no being could corrupt this wish.
  • illithid235illithid235
    edited July 2008
    I have to nullify that corruption, Queen. Just because pennies are called coppers does not mean that small coins gain the ability to arrest you.
  • QueenQuinlinQueenQuinlin
    edited July 2008
    Oh, CAN'T THEY?
    Edit: Maybe they decided to follow their name-sake's ((sp?)) legacy.
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    Pennies are called coppers in the UK! As are police!

    Queen: Your wish is corrupted by an intangible idea.

    I wish for a Conservative victory in the next UK general election.
  • QueenQuinlinQueenQuinlin
    edited July 2008
    Curses!
    The conservative's win in UK's general election. They then decided that you are a horrible person for wishing that would win, and send you to jail for the rest of your life.

    I wish that my wish cannot be corrupted by anything, or idea! Intangible or no!
  • SerephelSerephel
    edited July 2008
    China invades UK. You're communist now. Like me.

    I wish I had a cheeseburger.
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    Your idea self-corrupts.

    Your cheeseburger contains marmite.

    I wish I had a bowl of corn flakes with ice cold semi-skimmed milk...
  • ZlamzamboZlamzambo
    edited July 2008
    You drown in a bowl of corn flakes with ice cold semi-skimmed milk...

    I wish for a free Daft Punk helmet!!
  • brucebruce
    edited July 2008
    The daft punk helmet explodes because of the pure shittiness it represents.

    I wish for an fresh chicken roll, in a fresh crusty bap, with a smidgen of fresh ketchup in it without any weird stuff.
  • ReallyCleanSocksReallyCleanSocks
    edited July 2008
    You get a helmet. It has lice in it. You wear it and get lice. Nice job.

    EDIT: CURSES, Night Lord!

    You receive your food. It's really tasty. Except you don't realize that the chicken in undercooked. Thus, you get infected with salmonella.

    I wish every forum I frequent didn't have a wish corruption thread. Seriously, it's getting old.
  • NoLongerNoLonger
    edited July 2008
    Instead of not getting rid of some of the wish corruption threads you are forced to join several other forums that don't have them, you have no time to keep up with all of them and your job, but you must frequently visit all of them. You lose your job and become a bum who spends all his begging money at internet cafes.

    I wish to be more motivated to get better at art.
  • QueenQuinlinQueenQuinlin
    edited July 2008
    You get motivated to get better. You are so motivated to get better you cut off your ear, thinking that it will help. The cut gets infected, and you die.

    I wish the OB had a thread about Waldo.
  • NoLongerNoLonger
    edited July 2008
    The Orange Belt gains a thread started by the CIA about the whereabouts of Waldo, he's been on the run for many many years now. You take it as a joke thread and say he's at your house. The CIA raids your home, when they learn that you're not there they assume you ran, taking Waldo with you to try to hop the border. They hunt you down.

    I wish that humans could transport themselves safely out of the solar system and to the next.

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