Return of the Son of the Effed-Up News Thread Returns

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Comments

  • godgod
    edited February 2006
    going back to that teachers home-made porn, i hope she didn't look like any of my teachers...
  • edited February 2006
    I do, BAM!



    ...that was so unlike me I'm sorry.
  • edited February 2006
    I drove by the aftermath of this one, about an hour and a half after it happened.
  • edited February 2006
    "At that point, Stephens asked Temple to get off Harrison, Phares said. When Temple did not comply, he shot Temple four times in the chest."

    I'm sure that got his attention.
  • edited February 2006
    It would've been better if the guy was named "Chest" instead of "Temple".

    Because he was shot in the chest instead of the temple.

    If he had been named Chest it would have been a sort of thing that isn't irony but whose name I can't think of so I'll just call it ironic, don't you think?
  • godgod
    edited February 2006
    no
  • edited February 2006
    Well, maybe.
  • edited February 2006
    Mystery Blob Eating Downtown LA
    Los Angeles officials were still scratching their heads today over what caused a mysterious black goo to burble from streets downtown, forcing the evacuation hundreds of apartment dwellers.

    A Los Angeles Fire Department spokesman said investigators had yet to identify the ``black tarry substance'' more than 24 hours after it erupted at Olive Street and Pico Boulevard.

    But he said there might be ``a correlation'' with a petroleum company drilling operation nearby.

    ``The samples we have taken _ this was determined to be (a) nontoxin, nonflammable, nonhazard,'' said fire Capt. Ernie Bobadilla. ``We're looking to I.D. the scope of the problem.

    ``This problem is not a simple fix.''

    About 200 residents were forced to flee as a hazardous materials team and dozens of firefighters worked throughout the day to identify what was first deemed "a black tarry substance" and later morphed into a "watery mud."

    While outside temperatures struggled to break 60, sidewalks in the vicinity steamed at 103 degrees, Los Angeles Fire Department spokesman Ron Myers said.

    "It's worrisome in the fact that it will keep the street closed and residents will be evacuated till the building is considered safe," Myers said.

    Firefighters were alerted at 3 a.m. by complaints of a sewer-like smell at an apartment house at 1220 S. Olive St. near Pico Boulevard, but found nothing.

    They returned at 1 p.m. to find a Slimer-like ooze lurking beneath central Los Angeles.

    "We were called back because there was a gooey substance, a tarry-type substance, coming out the underground electrical vaults, out of manhole covers in the street, through the sidewalks and possibly in one older apartment building," Myers said.

    A 120-foot stretch of Olive buckled 1 1/2 feet, he said. The pre-1933 unreinforced masonry apartment building shifted one foot from its foundation. Sidewalks were as hot as Jacuzzis.

    And a pressurized liquid shot from every street orifice located above what used to be a historic oil field downtown.

    No one was injured in what amounted to a black lagoon. Hazmat and Urban Search and Rescue crews determined that the mysterious substance wasn't flammable, Myers said.

    "Incident commanders are evaluating some form of drilling operation one or two blocks away as the possible cause," he added.

    "They told us to get out from the building, because, probably, I don't know, anything could happen. The basement was flooding," resident Mary Robles told KABC-TV, Channel 7.

    By late afternoon, the American Red Cross had set up an evacuation center for the 150 adults and 50 children forced to flee the stuff of nightmares.

    "We're opening a shelter," said Nick Samaniego, spokesman for the Red Cross of Greater Los Angeles. "We're looking for a place to put them."
  • godgod
    edited February 2006
    that reminds me of how i heard about a killer flood of molases in boston in the early 1900's
  • edited February 2006
    That reminds me of Ghostbusters 2.
  • godgod
    edited February 2006
    that reminds me of ghostbusters
  • edited February 2006
    Yeah, but it reminds us more of Ghostbusters 2.... because of the goo.

    Ghostbusters n00b.
  • edited February 2006
    I was more thinking the original 'The Blob' movie.

    Now that's some quality entertainment.
  • edited February 2006
    "I tried to think of the most harmless thing. Something I loved from my childhood. Something that could never ever possibly destroy us. Mr. Stay Puft!"
  • edited February 2006
  • edited February 2006
    He is the most dangerous man in the world. Forget Osama, that dude needs to be taken down NOW.


    Well, more like a year ago, when I first read that report.
  • edited February 2006
    This isn't really "fucked up" so much as "completely pointless", but anyway.


    But yeah, apparently the guy can't do English, either...
    ""Their homework is so hard these days. I sat down with Brooklyn the other day -- and I was like, 'Victoria, maybe you should do the homework tonight'.

    "I think it was maths, actually. It's done totally differently to what I was teached when I was at school, and you know, I was like, 'Oh my God, I can't do this'. "
  • edited February 2006
    It's not pointless. The point is that soccer players can't do homework. Obviously.
  • edited February 2006
    Also, he's not very good at English either, he called it "maths."
  • edited February 2006
    Well, other than the fact that I already said that the guy couldn't do English either..... yeah, he also remarked that it was different than what "I was teached when I was in school."
  • edited February 2006
    I'm a bad student! I don't pay attention!
  • edited February 2006
    Nazis Cockblocked Again
    ORLANDO, Fla. - Violence broke out at a neo-Nazi rally before a planned march through a predominantly black neighborhood Saturday, with police making numerous arrests.

    Police hauled away at least five people in handcuffs after a fistfight broke out between supporters of the National Socialist Movement and counter-demonstrators who were voicing their displeasure with the group’s anti-minority message.

    It’s not immediately clear to which groups those arrested belonged.

    More than 300 law enforcement officers are on the scene. Some officers are patrolling with K-9 units and on horses, while police helicopters are circling above the march route.

    In October, the same neo-Nazi group gathered in Toledo, Ohio, for a march they said was intended to protest gangs and rising crime. The situation turned into a riot in which businesses were burned and looted and bricks were thrown at police.


    Ex-Taliban enrolled at Yale

    A FORMER spokesman for the Taliban, Rahmatullah Hashemi, has enrolled as a student at America's prestigious Yale University where he has taken a class on terrorism, The New York Times magazine reported today.

    The ex-Taliban spin doctor and "roving ambassador", who has spent time in the presence of al-Qaeda chief Osama bin Laden, is now a Yale "freshman" improving his English through a special non-degree program.

    Hashemi, who once publicly defended the Taliban, told the magazine, however, that he started having serious doubts about its harsh moral codes as early as 1998 when women were being lashed with leather strips and executions were occurring in Kabul's football stadium.

    He said he fled Afghanistan for Pakistan in the wake of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks on the US fearing an American bombing campaign.

    Hashemi, 27, said a former Taliban minister persuaded him to return to Kabul in early 2004 to clear his name with the Americans, despite his fears he would be whisked to the US prison camp at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

    Following several interviews with two Americans, one of whom only identified herself to him as "Michelle", Hashemi said he was told: "You can go."

    An American friend suggested he apply to study at the renowned Yale University, so he obtained a student visa from the US embassy in Islamabad and caught a flight to the United States.

    Months later, the dark-haired, bearded Hashemi is trying to adapt to his new academic surroundings, attending Harvard-Yale football games and keeping in touch with his wife and son back in Pakistan, the report said.

    "In some ways I'm the luckiest person in the world," he was quoted as saying in the New York Times magazine.

    "I could have ended up in Guantanamo Bay. Instead, I ended up at Yale."
  • edited February 2006
    Pulling double duty in the field of WTF? You'd HAVE to be a professor to do that.

    ...am I supposed to feel sorry for the nazis?

    The other guy is probably fine. Doing something like that...The U.S. is gonna have tabs on that guy for the rest of his life. He can't afford to screw up now.
  • godgod
    edited February 2006
    wait, they have courses on TERRORISM?
  • edited March 2006
    SAW MAN 'HACKS OFF OWN LEGS'
    A MAN who claimed a chainsaw gang chopped off his legs did it himself, police said yesterday.

    The unnamed van driver told them he was dragged from his vehicle by attackers who hacked at his legs with the saw before torching his Transit.

    But police revealed they now believe he turned the saw on himself.

    Retired policeman Jim Edgar, 61, found the man lying on the ground screaming at an isolated spot in Shilton, near Witney, Oxon, on Wednesday.

    He said: "Blood was gushing all over the place."

    A police source said: "It looks as if he did it to himself. The pain must have been horrific. God knows what possessed him."

    Officers would not comment on whether doctors had saved his legs.

    The man was still under heavy sedation yesterday.

    Calif. School Suspends 20 Over Web Site

    A middle school student faces expulsion for allegedly posting graphic threats against a classmate on the popular MySpace.com Web site, and 20 of his classmates were suspended for viewing the posting, school officials said.

    Police are investigating the boy's comments about his classmate at TeWinkle Middle School as a possible hate crime, and the district is trying to expel him.

    According to three parents of the suspended students, the invitation to join the boy's MySpace group gave no indication of the alleged threat. They said the MySpace social group name's was "I hate (girl's name)" and included an expletive and an anti-Semitic reference.

    A later message to group members directed them to a nondescript folder, which included a posting that allegedly asked: "Who here in the (group name) wants to take a shotgun and blast her in the head over a thousand times?"

    Because the creator of a posting can change its content at any time, it's unclear how much the students saw.

    "With what the students can get into using the technology we are all concerned about it," Bob Metz, the district assistant superintendent of secondary education, said Wednesday.

    Metz said the students' suspensions in mid-Febuary were appropriate because the incident involved student safety. Some parents however questioned whether the school overstepped its bounds by disciplining students for actions that occurred on personal computers, at home and after school hours.
  • edited March 2006
    "With what the students can get into using the technology we are all concerned about it."

    Incoherency is nearly as awesome as suspending people for posting on weblogs!
  • edited March 2006
    Yeah, seriously.

    When somebody made a "killfreakyjon" lj account I just publicly humiliated him. Anybody who goes to the trouble of making a weblog about something like that is never actually going to do anything about it.
  • edited March 2006
    I don't know about that, Jon. It may be pathetic to create a web site about how much you hate someone, but it doesn't mean the person won't take it further. And if someone is in an administrative position, and sees something like that... well, they'd be retarded not to do something.
  • edited March 2006
    Prosthetic leg stolen! But only for a while.